


Regrets

by amuk



Category: Code Geass
Genre: Angst, Brother-Sister Relationships, Community: 31_days, Dreams, F/M, Friendship/Love, Gen, Implied Relationships, Introspection, Loss, One-Sided Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-22
Updated: 2013-01-22
Packaged: 2017-11-26 11:03:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/649849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amuk/pseuds/amuk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dreams remind him of what he's lost, of what can never come back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Regrets

**Author's Note:**

> I, to my eternal regret, forgot to put in Euphie. Why, oh why, did I forget her? D:
> 
> Day/Theme: August 12 // No yesterdays on the road

Lelouch dreams, of smiles and rain and Nunally. Nunally's hair is a little shorter than it is now, sticking to her face as they walk back to Suzaku's (their) home. Her hands curl around Suzaku's neck, her face upturned to catch the wet pellets, and there is a soft smile on her face.  
  
Suzaku grunts softly as they start to climb uphill. Lelouch would help, but any time he tries the other boy glares and walks faster.  
  
It's a pattern they fall into after a while.  
  
Gradually, they go faster and faster, almost running, and Nunally's light brown tresses take a coppery tone, her eyes open to a olive green, and suddenly Shirley is crying in front of him.  
  
A gun in her hand, scar on her chest, and the blood flows off her like his madness.   
  
She still smiles, that bittersweet smile, still cocks that gun as she turns it away from him.  
  
And it points at her head, at her still beating heart, and she mouths the words _I love you_.  
  
 _I love you and will always do so and--No, don't die, don't say that_ , and soon his voice takes over where hers stops.   
  
She disappears into the rain, her body dissolving as he reaches to touch it, and nothing is left of the girl.  
  
There's him and the blood, the blood that covers his hands when he closes his eyes. They stick to him like glue, like gloves, and no matter how hard he washes, it never comes off.  
  
(But then again, that would be too easy, wouldn't it?)  
  
The blood flows on, covering the earth like an ocean. It reaches his knees, his thighs, his waist, and there is no stop.  
  
Kallen glances at him from the red surface, a frown on her face as she tries to reach him. In one hand she twirls her keys, twisting it in smaller and smaller arcs. Her other moves across the surfaces, a skater searching for cracks. She mouths something, something he already knows but refuses to acknowledge, and her hands move more frantically.  
  
He splashes the reflection away before anything happens.  
  
It's the same dream he gets every night now, of their lives and hopes and losses.   
  
He wakes the same way every morning, his hands clenching the bed-sheets, his blankets a tangled mess. Brushing his hair away from his face, he glances to where C.C. is sleeping, her arms tucked around Cheese-kun.  
  
Good. She's still here. The one constant in his life now. She glances at him when he moves, used to this by now, and smirks lightly before lowering her head once more.  
  
Getting up, he heads to the bathroom, ignoring his reflection. He doesn't have the time to look back now, to see those paths he could have taken, those deaths he could have avoided.   
  
He has to keep moving forward because the moment he stops, Lelouch knows he'll break down.


End file.
